Ancestor Rituals: Your Most Important Prayer

September 05, 2020 by Lalitha Donatella Riback

I will never forget the day my father died. My sister called me from Italy and put him on the phone. I hadn’t seen him in at least two decades, and we had never been close.

Also, when I moved to Chicago from Rome, our lives had shifted apart. I never missed him.

In fact, my parents had divorced when I was 12, and I mostly grew up with my mother and stepfather.

My father was now dying due to the terminal stage of a disease that had weakened him in the last few years of his life.

But this phone call was meant to change everything.

In the short talk we had, my father told me he’d missed me terribly, and that he once even considered going on national TV to try to find me.

In fact, I’d never stayed in touch, and had specifically forbidden my sisters from sharing my phone numbers with him.

On the phone, I cried. He cried.

He passed away that same night.

Soul Genetics

During that difficult time (and ever since) a profound teaching and technology that I’d learned from my great spiritual teacher, Dr. Pillai, came in very handy.

The teaching was Soul Genetics, a term coined by Dr. Pillai to explain how we inherit the soul tendencies of our ancestors. He also gave a technique to heal our ancestral connections, Tarpanam.

Tarpanam means feeding your dead ancestors, helping them cross into a higher dimension so they become happier, evolve, and bless you.

Our successes, relationship happiness and good finances depend heavily on their blessings. For this there’s a common saying in India:

Shiva will not answer your prayers until you feed your ancestors.

In the light of the yogic tradition, this means that you need to make peace with your genetics, because you are hardwired to repeat your ancestors’ behaviors.

So helping our departed ancestor go to heaven (or cross into the light, if you will) is both a gesture of love and self-care.

On a Personal Level

After ordering a specialized Tarpanam that was performed in Tamil Nadu in honor of my father after his passing, I felt that my troubled relationship with him was healed.

A few days later, I even had a dream of him dressed in white, surrounded by pure, white light. He was smiling.

This dream went a long way to evaporate my hard feelings towards my father, and the sadness I’d experienced in childhood.

A few years later, I felt even more relief after another sacred ritual for my ancestors that lasted seven hours! Flowers, special seeds, rice, fruits and sacred chanting were offered to my ancestors.

Happily, in the following days I experienced several positive changes in my relationship, work and outlook.

Placebo or miracle? I will let you decide. I believe that much of our lives happens on subtle levels—and that’s what the concepts of subconscious and unconscious are made of.

Also, as a practitioner and researcher of yogic philosophies, arts and science, and consciousness, I believe that we live simultaneously in five bodies or koshas:

Annamaya kosha (body of food or earth element)
Pranamaya kosha (vital body or water element)
Manomaya kosha (mental body or fire element)
Vijnanamaya kosha (intellect & intuitive body or air element)
Anandamaya kosha (bliss body, ether or space element)

Uninterrupted connection

Some modern scientists, too, believe that it’s possible to inherit our ancestors’ thoughts and inclinations.

Dr. Darold Treffert, for example, has observed among the so-called savant that they possessed natural knowledge and talents without ever learning them.

He attributes these incredible capacities to genetic memory.

Your Ancestors Need Your Help, And You Need Theirs

The yogis say that due to great confusion, and bad karma (which is made of ancestral and habitual thoughts that continue after death), some souls remain on the earth plane and around their living families.

These conditions can cause immense suffering to both the living and the departed.

Knowing Your Family Tree Is Not Enough

It doesn’t matter whether you know the names of your departed ancestors. Also, just looking at their pictures or updating the family tree won’t change neither their conditions nor yours.

What’s crucial, says Dr. Pillai, is that your ancestors’ souls go to a good place or higher plane of existence.

This transfer can be done through the technology of Tarpanam, the specialized ancestral rituals.

Ancestral Rituals in the Golden Age

It’s interesting that in China, Japan, India and in more ancient cultures, there’s deep respect for ancestral worship. This practice is still alive today.

According to Dr. Pillai, soon this science will return and become widespread.